Hello again ….its been a busy few months for sure . I have been in a step challenge and a in training to climb/hike small mountain in Banff . When I go I will take in my heart my friend of 50 years .
First a little background , my friend and I have known each other for 50 years , longer than some marriages last . During that time we have had our moments and issues …but never have been able to remember a time in my life when she was not there for me . She was the product of a divorced family , back then it was a bad thing , and also had some lack of pigmentation to her skin . All these things led to her being punted from most kids. This made her a very compassionate person and fiercely loyal to her friends . We shared an interesting childhood together and remained friends after high school . I recall one beautiful memory of an outdoor midway in the summer a whole bunch of us going on a really giant Ferris Wheel it was late at night and right at the top as we were stopped the fireworks went off .. it was magical. Soon enough though we moved a way from the small town we were from and ventured into the Big City had no idea who we were and what to expect . My friend was in trade school and another friend was in college I was working so we logically became roommates. There were good times and bad … a few more memorable included the night she made yorkshire pudding and left the oil heating …..we were engrossed in a Disney cartoon , heard a knock on the door and were astounded to see smoke everywhere….our landlords had seen smoke coming through the vents upstairs and panicked !!! Another time on I guess on a hot day we got rather testy and someone threw a glass of water ….well glasses turned to bowls and bowls turned to buckets with the outcome being me blow drying my sheets at 11:00 pm while they laughed in my doorway… eventually I moved away and got married .My friend also got married and followed her hubby to Europe . She had a child there and they moved back to Canada to east coast I got to see her on visits home and saw her on a brief trip to the east coast
Eventually she moved back to our province and there they had another child . I recall her visiting me with him I think we may have had our daughter by then too.
When my first marriage fell apart, she was there . When I started to date again ,she was there. When I got married she was a huge part of my day. I was not a me-first bride this time but shared my day by making her into a beautiful version of my dear friend , this makes me happy, even to this day , her hubby says its his favorite picture of her …me too. she told me later she was very touched to be included in my wedding and found the experience a lot of fun , so glad she did she was a really big help!
Back in 2003 a phone call ..her heart was not good and they were putting her on a transplant list . She declined and said I am going to fight, she did , and gained back some use of her heart …during this time she travelled a lot to places she needed to see, she seemed to know she was on borrowed time .
The first inkling of trouble came before my wedding she had to have some bit of her toe removed …very upset because she could not wear the shoes she had bought especially for the day…I was just happy she was there. She had been on IV antibiotics for a bone infection. She was happy not to be dragging an IV pole down the aisle .
Her health seemed to plummet right after our wedding for infection more thing cut off until finally she had her leg amputated. She spent months in the hospital and had it moulded to fit a prosthetic ,only to have even more of it amputated later . So …we should be good now right? …wrong! this spring she lost the other leg…did I mention she is also on dialysis ??? Now her port for it got infected badly …currently she is waiting to lose a digit which has necrotised…
I am slowly coming to terms with the knowledge that my friend who was always there for me may not be very soon . There are some pockets of my brain that are not liking this thought , but through my sadness and tears I realize she is getting tired of this crap life has handed her.
An update: she continues to fight, we continue to hope , and since weather prevented from my chosen climb this fall …I am once again planning a climb . During a phone convo with her she said ” be my feet, climb it for me ” . This is the one thing I can do for her how I can be there for her ..through my tears I vow to do just so for my dear friend .